Tuesday, July 12, 2011


Today, I turn fifteen. 

That is exciting and scary and many other things, all at the same time. But before that, let me reflect on fourteen. In my fourteenth year, I did a great many things. Some were big, like starting high school and writing a novel in a month. Like starting this blog and traveling to Hawaii. Some things were smaller, more ordinary. I laughed (a lot) and cried (more than I'd like to admit). I made new friends and new memories. Fourteen was a good year, a year of change & growth & learning to appreciate the little things. With that behind me, here's to fifteen.

Fifteen. Truthfully, I sometimes feel a lot older than that. Sometimes I feel like I am forty, worrying about all the things I have to do, or maybe seventy-five, with tired bones and a heart seeped in nostalgia. And sometimes, fifteen seems like such an insanely old age. Sometimes I feel like I am still five, wanting to curl up in my mom's lap, or eleven, running around the neighborhood with my best friend. And sometimes, I guess, I feel like a teenager. 

And even though I'm not eleven, I still love this quote.

"What they don't understand about birthdays and what they never tell you is that when you're eleven, you're also ten, and nine, and eight, and seven, and six, and five, and four, and three, and two, and one. And when you wake up on your eleventh birthday you expect to feel eleven, but you don't. You open your eyes and everything's just like yesterday, only it's today. And you don't feel eleven at all. You feel like you're still ten. And you are—underneath the year that makes you eleven. 

Like some days you might say something stupid, and that's the part of you that's still ten. Or maybe some days you might need to sit on your mama's lap because you're scared, and that's the part of you that's five. And maybe one day when you're all grown up maybe you will need to cry like if you're three, and that's okay. That's what I tell Mama when she's sad and needs to cry. Maybe she's feeling three. 

Because the way you grow old is kind of like an onion or like the rings inside a tree trunk or like my little wooden dolls that fit one inside the other, each year inside the next one. That's how being eleven years old is. 

You don't feel eleven. Not right away. It takes a few days, weeks even, sometimes even months before you say Eleven when they ask you. And you don't feel smart eleven, not until you're almost twelve. That's the way it is."

( by Sandra Cisneros )

Well, happy birthday to me. And you, happy un-birthday to you! (Or birthday, I suppose, if we happen to be twins.)


P.S. Not sure what's up with the font/spacing stuff here. As we all well know...Blogger...well, it likes to do its own thing.


  1. Happy birthday cousin! I love that quote now too, and I hope you have a very happy birthday


  2. Happy birthday Kendall! I hope you have an amazing day, and that your whole entire fifteenth year is brilliant.
    That quote is so true.

  3. Happy birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy birthday deaaaar Kendall, happy birthday to you!


  4. Happy birthday, Kendall! I love the birthday candles! Hey, maybe you should change the age in your bio on the sidebar :)

  5. Happy Birthday Kendall! Hope you have an awesome birthday! :) love that quote

  6. Happpy birthday!!!
    Love the macro shot of the candles! :D

  7. Happy Birthday, Kendall! I hope you're having a wonderful day!! The quote is great, too. :)

  8. Happy Birthday, Kendall! I hope your day is filled with all kinds of wonderful things and that fifteen is an amazing year for you, lovely. :)

  9. Happy birthday! :)
    Pretty focus in the photos.
    You have plenty of time left to be young! Fifteen is still an age of youth.

  10. Happy birthday Kendall!! Hope you have a great year being 15 :)

  11. HAPPY BIRTHDAY. That's the third time today that I've said that. It's also my grandpa's birthday. I think he's 66, 67, or 68. No one knows his age.

    Also, I understand you're not dressing up for the premier? Prepare to be shunned.

    Finally, I never knew you did NaNoWriMo. You should tell us stuff more often.

  12. Happy birthday. I hope you will accomplish many more things this year. Best wishes to this coming year and may God bless you with health and many more birthdays to come!

    PS you just got a new follower. Perhaps you will visit me sometime? It would be an honor.

    Xoxo Flor

  13. happy birthday :) i hope that you've had the best 15 years of your life so far, and that there will be many more to come!

    ps. im your newest follower - amazing blog!


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