being green

In regards to being green, I don't mean the eco-friendly type. Or the Kermit the Frog kind, either. I mean jealousy, envy, etc. etc. etc. That little green monster.

It's so easy for me to become jealous. Reading blogs, scanning photo-streams, I see what other people have and I covet it. Questions swirl around in my clouded mind, like: Why don't my photos turn out that well? How did they get so many followers? And, of course, why isn't my life as 'good' as theirs? It seems like they spend their days taking photos, drinking tea, watching the rain. Reading books, baking cakes, laughing with friends. Traveling around the world and buying things on a whim. They can post at any time of the day, are not inhibited by school or chores or parents.

Why can't my life be like that? Why am I not that happy? Yes, I am not proud of it, but I will admit it, because it is a very human emotion: I get jealous. I'm always weary of the people who say things like, "Oh, I don't get jealous." How very lucky for you, then. Do you not get sad either? 

Once again, this cat is not mine. His name is Woodrow and he is my neighbors'. So cute!

Even though I would like my life to be one big weekend, the truth is that it is not. I have to make do with what I have. I may not be the girl who's constantly jetting off to Paris, or even the one who's got a lot of friends to write to. Maybe someday, but for now, no. I'm just little old me and that's okay. I don't need for my life to mimic someone else's, just because it sounds like fun. I shouldn't need a vast array of camera lenses or a thousand followers to be happy. I can be okay with the happy things I do have, like library books and ice cream bowls and fluffy shedding cats and the seventy-four awesome followers I do have.

I don't know what I'm really trying to say with this post. Maybe it's that I shouldn't compare my life to other people's. Or that that instead of wallowing in what I don't have, I should be appreciating what I do.

I mean, life still goes on, regardless of your attitude.
But wouldn't you rather enjoy it?

-Kendall

P.S. I finally made a new header. You like? Is it big enough? It took forever to upload because apparently I've used up all of my photo space on Blogger. I knew this day would come but I didn't think it would be so soon! I've deleted some old pictures from old blogs and I'm probably going to start uploading through Flickr now. I was prepared but it's still so frustrating. Have any of you had this problem?

P.P.S. Also, you can now contact me via email. ;)